Shuffle

I was walking to school the other day, thinking how cool it was that having an ipod is like having my very own theme music. I had been listening to Jack Johnson's song People Watching, lazily gazing at people at they walked by and wondering what made their lives interesting. At that point, my life was a little tedious, and I wished for something to spice it up a little. One little wish, that's all it was. I put my ipod on shuffle and walked along to the beat of Weezer's Island in the Sun. As I walked I noticed how unusually hot it was for 8am in Provo, and did a double take at some palm trees that I swear were large oaks yesterday. I took my jacket off because it was really too warm for a jacket and shrugged off the palm trees I had obviously not noticed until now. The song changed, and Dolores O'Riordan's voice filled my eardrums with the sounds of Zombie. All the sudden, the weather cooled again, so on went my jacket, and into the pockets went my hands. Was it just me, or were the people around me hurrying a bit faster? The expressions on their faces was a mixture of hostility and fear. I saw where the fear was coming from as I noticed the uniformed men with guns. What was happening? Sounds of gunshots and explosions began to fill my ears, getting closer and louder, and I started running for... I don't even know where. Class was the last thing on my mind. This was a matter of survival. My life was on the line. Breathing heavily, I crouched down next to an SUV, hoping it would all be over soon. I saw a man in uniform approach me, gun at ready. I started to run, but he yelled a warning for me to stay put or he'd shoot. I felt like I was going to thow up my heart, because I was nauseous and my heart was beating in my throat. He got closer, and all of the sudden the explosions stopped, the sun started shining and Michael Buble was singing For Once in My Life. The soldier, who was now in a khakis and a button-down shirt, looked strangely like Brad Pitt as he got down on one knee and pulled out a ring. My mind was rebelling, this was crazy! But I knew we would be happy together as I nodded yes and wiped away a tear. We danced in the street, and all the passers-by cheered. But alas, my happiness was short lived, as Ben Folds started singing Song for the Dumped. The soldier/Brad Pitt lookalike then asked for the ring back and asked for some "time apart." The tears on my face mingled with the falling rain, and I threw the ring at him and turned away, finding a baseball bat in my hand as I heard Carrie Underwood's Before He Cheats. I chuckled evilly to myself as I faced his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, and swung away, leaving his truck looking like it had ended up on the wrong end of a wrecking ball. I felt empowered, vindicated, imagining the look on his face as he saw what I had done. I took one last swing, and as I did the headphones fell out of my ears and I was once again walking to class, no sign of baseball bats, bombs, or palm trees. I took one look at my ipod, walked to the nearest trash can, and threw it in.
Weird.